Letter to fellow parent

I have a bone to pick.

Makeup does not belong on a 10 year old girl with the rare exception being made for sleepover play and Halloween costumes.  This is our family standard and belief.  Not wearing mascara, blush and lipgloss in 5th grade does not make our child a "social outcast" as you adamantly and repeatedly insisted within her hearing and the hearing of all her 5th grade friends.  As mature and responsible as our daughters may be, they are 10 year old children.  Tell me, who does my child need to be pretty for?  Who's attention and approval should she be seeking?  If you start down this road at 10 years old, where are you at 16?

It is not that you disagree with my parenting style.  It is that you openly criticize me and single out my daughter with your hurtful words.   Perhaps you felt as though you were advocating for Ali.  Perhaps you felt we were being unfair.  Perhaps you didn't bother to consider our relationship with our daughter or that while she may disagree with our decisions at times, she respects them.  She has noticed that her mom and dad will risk going against the popular decision, we will risk upsetting her, to stand by what we believe. She is secure in the fact that her parents care about her, love her beyond measure and have her best interests at heart at all times.  Perhaps it's none of your business.

I anticipate we will soon be having a conversation about our decision not to allow our child to travel with the soccer team to Phoenix.  While we appreciate the invitation, the only traveling we are interested in with our 5th grade soccer player are those destinations that can be easily reached by car with her family.  Quite simply, my 10 year old daughter goes where her parents go.  My husband and I realize that most of the families on this team will not hesitate.  However, we believe that traveling by air to an out-of-state tournament with chaperones is an appropriate opportunity for a high school athlete, after having earned the travel funds herself.  I hope that when this conversation happens, that it is brief and received without judgement and immature words.  And I pray that if it is not, that I have the strength of heart, clarity of thought and calmness of spirit to kindly tell you to SHUT UP.

-Katie